Just say no, America, it’s easy.
Just say no, America the Beautiful, rather than dutifully lying
back while dying black & blue in pools of oily stupor
A hypodermic barrel fed mainlined super-duper stupor
Needing the narcotic of imported crude
Feeding into damaged veins
Bleeding into deranged brains that can’t begin to explain
why we were so high on the stuff we huffed & puffed but
failed to participate enough at the Kyoto summit.
Of course we can’t relate, debate, participate in world
ecological summits
We’d have to look at ourselves through foreign eyes,
hear their impatient sighs, while studying our couch potato
thighs stuffed into SUV’s exempt from miles per gallon
minimums while they cringe and all say, “Just say no.”
Just say no, you addicted tricked out with way too much you
shout about America.
USA! USA! Shut the fuck up for God Sake!
Just say no.
But hold steady, U.S. not ready
We know we’re not
We know we’re not because of lessons taught in California
By these fuckin’ Enron Fucks
You gotta fuck these motherfuckin’ fucks
These sleaze-ball cheese-ball grab-‘em-by-the-balls and
Squeeze all
Enron Execs from Texas
Who can rot in hot pots of lots of rotten red hot ocelot snot
for all I care.
Oh, I’m here to tell they’re going to hell
And no, not because they ripped off your aunts 401K
Stashed their employees cash down their pants
Inspired rants
That ain’t the way to get into hell these days
No, that’s business
Everybody steals.
Get real
That’s all they respect
What else have we come to come to expect.
No these execs leaving wrecks in their wakes have greater mistakes
to atone for, to be stoned for, to burn in hell alone for.
These motherfuckers had a thought and bought up shit they really
ought not have bought.
Every decent sized mom & pop alternative energy power shop
in California
To eliminate the competition
Every one.
Back when they were buying and selling energy.
And what was done with every one?
Shut them down?
No, they tore them to the ground.
Destroyed, deployed munitions that toyed with little power
grids getting rid of anything that might clean burn develop
keeping the planet inhabitable for your kids kids
These Enron nit-wits blew the shit to bits
To keep us dependant
Like a drug-dealer on the block, chock full of cock & bull,
and on the clock
Keeping your ass addicted, your class restricted, your drug
prescripted, your neighborhood interdicted.
So fuck you very much
For your corporate hacks taking whacks at what we could have
been about
And fuck you for your rolling blackouts that showed California
just how far, and the rest of the country how addicted we all
are.
And how impossible withdrawal now seems for all
So, now we’re going to rape Alaska for an emergency fix,
another 800 billion barrels, or maybe only 36.
But that’s another freight to pay
Another fix, another day
If there’s a problem, they tell us true, who gives a
fuck about the caribou.
There’s money to be made, pipes to be laid, de-tox to
be delayed
Because who cares about unspoiled Alaskan snow
Or that whole global warming free-for-all, an even harder row
to hoe
That oil monkey on our back, all he knows to do is grow
While we fix another fix so our addiction might lay low
Desperate, like a coke whore, for another line of blow
Stuck in the denial of what we pretend that we don’t
know
But the curtain comes down on even the longest running show
Epically if we can’t spit out the words and Just. Say.
No.
Fargo: Brian Dykstra is Far Gone in Fargo North Dakota. rant
Urban Desires 3.6 November-December 1997
Nobody Asked Me But...: Brian Dykstra rants off on
just about everything even though who the hell asked him? rant
Urban Desires 3.4 July-August 1997
Smelling Fishy: Brian Dykstra has gone Smelly Phishy,
lends a fin and rants on all things under the sea. rant
Urban Desires 3.3: May-June 1997
Up, Up And Away...Into the Woods: Brian Dykstra lets
loose on media-meglomania: JonBenet, A well-shod Tiger and the Hale-Boppers
Last Supper. rant
Urban Desires 3.2 March-April 1997
Brian Dykstra rants in real audio now: What about?
Poor Starving Artists. Listen up. rant
Urban Desires 3.1 January-February 1997
NFL or Bust: Brian Dykstra rants off on football...
at least we think that's what it's about. rant
Urban Desires 2.5 November-December 1996
Vote or What?: Brian Dykstra ponders the whole damn
process. rant
Urban Desires 2.4 September 1996
Tripping With Cops: Brian Dykstra: Tripping with
Cops. Brian does time in the Grand Jury box. rant
Urban Desires 2.3 August 1996
A Bone to Pick: "Excuse me? You want me to call
you WHAT? Yeah, well go 'master' THIS, pal!" Barky Dykstra sets
humans straight on the state of human/dog relations. rant
Urban Desires 2.2 June-July 1996
The Littlest Peter: If Rantster Brian Dykstra is
anything, he's peeved. Apparently bitter over his slight in the 1980
NBA Draft, Mr. Dykstra explores the grandure of being a sports star
in the USofA. rant
Urban Desires 2.1 April-May 1996
It Doesn't Mean Everybody Isn't Out to Get You: Another Last
Word On...Paranoia
Who him, Paranoid?! Brian Dykstra takes a quick look over his shoulder before
ducking into the alley of his shadowy life...BOO! rant
Urban Desires 2.0 January-March 1996
First Lady and the Tramp: Brian Dykstra lets loose
on Senator D'um D'um! rant
Urban Desires 1.7 November-December 1995
Another Last word On...: Brian Dykstra sinks his
teeth into our favorite media darling. Then, he tees off on some of
his adoring UD fans. rant
Urban Desires 1.6 September-October 1995
Smoke This: Rantmaster Brian Dykstra is smokin' hot
about the tobacco companies' hypocrisy. Plus, a BONUS MINI-RANT aimed
at the Partnership for a Drug-Free America. (Ouch!) rant
Urban Desires 1.5 July-August 1995
Things We Know: Rantmaster Brian Dykstra spews volumes
on lessons never learned, for no reason known to man. rant
Urban Desires 1.4 May-June 1995
Rantings of a Mad Fan: Resident spew-master Brian
Dykstra is in a good mood this time. It's a happy, wonderful, ball-catching,
base-stealing, fly-hitting time of year, and Brian tells you (once
again) how he feels about it. rant
Urban Desires 1.3 March-April 1995
No Shame: People who smack their young'uns in public.
Brian Dykstra wraps his craw around that one. rant
Urban Desires 1.2 January-February 1995
Snowboarding with a Buzz On: Columnist Brian Dykstra
finds disturbing jokes or humerous conspiracies or plain old ignorance
in a bevy of advertisements. rant
Urban Desires 1.1 November-December 1994
November 8th...Remember That?: Columnist Brian Dykstra
tees off on the election that reflected the frustration of a nation. rant
